Hi Friends--Do you know some one who constantly talks about dull, boring things and has to tell you every last detail? Do they drone on and on when you want to just shout, "I don't care about your pathetic night of watching television and eating Doritos!" Do they make you yawn uncontrollably? Tell us who this "dullster" in your life is and what is most annoying about their long, drawn out communication style. Finally, what do you yourself do to avoid being dull and boring when you speak? Learning to speak briefly and with impact and excitement is a skill we hope to polish this summer. Some techniques include: Editting out the mundane details and sharing only "key highlights" of an event or experience. Also, not repeating yourself unless it is purposeful and not speaking in a monotone. Finally, reading your audience and adapting when you get "cues" such as yawns or glances at watches...These tips will keep you from putting your friends to sleep during conversations and help you dazzle your teachers too. What is your tip for us? We need each other's help, no one wants to be BORING!!!! Peace--Bloggisha
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Blog #2: WHO CARES???
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36 comments:
One of my siblings is known for talking incessantly about nothing of interest. Her kids would rather be grounded than subjected to a lecture. It is not usually silly details of her life she insists on sharing but something she has developed an opinion on and wants to share. The worst part is that she knows that we all think she rambles and avoid calling her unless we have hours to devote to whatever topic she feels strongly about that day.
I avoid being dull and boring when I speak by using sarcasm and joking around. I also try not to speak unless I feel that I actually have something worth contributing. Watching my "audience" reaction helps too, if the person seems bored then it is time to stop talking.
let's not leave any further than my own house where my mother would always be. and yes, that is right, folks!my mother is such a nagger.she nags, whines,and moans constantly at the simplest things in existence, it's not quite a place to call "home" after working and going to school all day everyday.she can only carry a conversation about food and baking.other than that category, i don't think she would be able to survive in this cruel world, even though she tried to show that she could.why she has a narrow mindset and a very hypociritical physique? i really dont want to try to know her.i gave up on that; she could change if she wants her other daughter back (me).
to avoid being dull and boring, i usually try to talk as clear and to be as energetic as possible as i can be.i also try to feel confident on any topic that i would be talking about and made sure that im quite well informed on that matter.most importantly, i tried to make my audience feel comfortable and welcomed.
The dullster in my life? That has to be an instructor I had about three years ago (not at CRC). Although the subject matter was very interesting, she managed to make it the most boring class ever. She was highly intelligent and knew the subject very well, however her poor lecturing style made quite a difference. For instance, she would have her back faced to the class while writing down everything she says on the blackboard. Consequently, she could not see the cues being made by the class such as people falling asleep or even walking out of the classroom. I believe that presentation is everything. Even the most mundane topic could be found interesting if presented in an enthusiastic fashion.
Tips? Be audience-centered, talk with enthusiasm, and speak clearly/loud enough to be heard.
Laarni
I think a lot of students in CRC know this person that I am going to call the dullest and boring professor(I won't say his name though..hehe).. He is a psychology instructor. His voice is so flat and it's like he is hypnotizing you to fall asleep(seriously!!). I tried to stay awake by having enough sleep at night, drinking lots of coffee, eating chocolates, and energy drink as my last strategy. But all of it didn't work. I am very sensitive to caffeine and it usually keeps me awake all day, but I guess I'm more sensitive with his lullaby voice.
I am a very shy and quiet person at times and just depends on the people that I'm with. And to tell you the truth, I'm really bad in being a humurous person. But I still try my best though to make a conversation interesting and funny. Joking around and not being too serious is the best way to make a conversation more fun and less dull. But ofcourse, make sure it is at the right time or mood.
J. Aquino
Friends are life's reminders that everything is ok....one of my best friends in the world, (who shall remain nameless), love him to death, but he seems to always want to explicate his technical knowledge to the n'th degree. granted, he knows his stuff, and in his business, it keeps him alive. my buddy "j" is a journeyman electrician, been doing it for almost 10 years. he's the alpha male that seems to know everything about nothing. whether it be citing electrical code, or wire ratings, or building regulations, he's so passionate about it, almost to the point of insanity. we could be at home depot or lowes or walmart, and he would instantly comment on the way the data cabling or the light fixtures were done shabbily. oh, but it doesn't just stop there boys and girls....boxing, his sport du jour. hand speed, pounds per inch, reach, historical records, fighting styles, types of gloves...you name it, he knows it. funny how we've known each other for almost 20 years now and not one time did he ever mention that he was such a boxing afficionado. we can't sit and watch a boxing match without him spouting out some mundane detail about the fighters, or the gloves, or the referee, or the ring turnbuckle material, or the tape used on their knuckles..dammit man! let's just watch these guys slug it out in peace....sheeesh!
Pat Gregorio Jr.
first comment is mine...Kathleen McCombs
I don't know to many people who drone on about boring thing. It may be that I'm a very curious person who finds many things interesting. I feel like i'm the dull one because I talk and people seem to tune me out pretty quickly. I have some good moments of sarcasm and wit which help avoid some of those boring moments. It also depends very much on where I'm at work or play are to immensly different things for me. thus, i'm basically a quiet person.
I try not to be dull by asking questions and talking about subjects my audience seems interested in. If i don't know much about the subject i'll ask more questions. I'm unafraid of silence so if you don't feel like talking it's cool with me.
Chris M.
You know that certain Uncle Joe that you see at all your family gatherings? The one that rambles on and on about how it was like as a child and how kids these days have it easy. He would seem to be like the "never-ending rambler" that doesn't even let you get a word in the conversation. Well my uncle Joe is just that. With never-ending accounts of his early childhood days and the same stories being told over and over again, he never fails in putting me to sleep. Though, he's still my uncle and I totally respect him.
To avoid being "Uncle Joe," I try to talk about things that my audience would be fairly interested in. Also, having an interactive conversation will do wonders in keeping the audience interested in what you're saying. Also, as Sandra mentioned, I think cues from the audience would be extremely useful as indications for how the conversation is going. This should give an idea as to how to adjust yourself during a conversation/speech.
Jason F.
You guys and gals and all other gneders in between really get this stuff--I mean your speeches tonight ROCKED! I never yawned ONCE!!!--Sandra
Yes there is a person like that in my life. He is a friend at work and he loves to do nothing except talk about how much he knows. No matter what the subject is he always knows the answer . He talks about his life all the time and all he does is go to school, work, and the gym. Very Boring.
I usually talk to different people about different stuff. I found out that not everyone likes to talk about the same thing and you have to talk to the right person about the right topic.
Navy
Okay here we go.I have a friend, we usually hang out majority of time with other friends playing pool,we play soccer togeather and technically we play on the same team. It just very difficult to be around him when we loose a game because he always braggs and tries to talk about the last games we won and how he scored a goal. To my knowledge he has only scored one goal for us. He goes on and on and on. Any ways this has been going on for the last couple of years and i got tired of it.
To avoid the conversation what i do is as soon as we loose a game, i just pack my things and leave the field and now my other friends are doing it to.So i hope he is not talking to himself when we are gone.
vijay
My father is a very boring person because he always seems to ask the same repetitive questions and his interest of conversation do not interest me. The questions he usually asks consist of my well being such as my status at school and about my academic future. These questions seems to surface over and over during random times at dinner time. His way of speaking always appears monotone and in a very serious manner.
When my father approaches me with these same questions during the course of the day, i would assert my audience techniques of being very quiet and supplementing simples responses as to keep the conversation at a minimal. In addition, i would provide my dad with feedbacks as to please change the topics, as it gets very annoying at times. Being a active audience with criticism are proven to be effective methods in dealing with my father's boring conversations.
Bryan Ngo
Yes, I have one of those dull and boring people in my life. She was my classmate when I first started going to school here about six years ago and we eventually became friends. This person is very pleasant and affable. On the other hand, she just can't carry an interesting conversation- that would be almost impossible. She seems to think that she’s an expert in anything and everything. “The Jack of all trades, master of none.” Whenever we talk on the phone, I always make excuses, so I could get off the phone- especially when she starts repeating herself too many times of the same nonsense topic. Most of our conversation evolved around her childhood experiences and superstitious beliefs that she strongly adhered to. It’s sad, but true. Oh well- at least she's pleasant...
To avoid having a dull and boring conversation, I usually try to pay attention to the signs and cues of boredom that my audiences make like yawning, sleeping, smiling, etc… Being sensitive to your audience’s feedback, this will help you (speaker) learn about your audience interests and to know them better. This way you’ll have an idea of what to include and what to avoid in the conversation. I’m usually a shy and quiet person, but I usually try to make my conversation appropriate to the audience, occasion and environment.
R. McCarty
This one friend of mine, oh my. She can go on and on about nothing or everything. I think she just does not like silence. She loves talking about people and what they are doing. Sometimes I might know the person she is talking about but other times I do not. She could care less though. I usually change the subject when I get the chance but if there is another pause she has no problems jumping right in about another random person. I sit and listen most of the time but when she starts repeating herself that is where I draw the line. When that does happen I have no problems telling her "You already told me about this, think of something different". That tends to keep her quite for a moment. She is my friend though so I will keep going through this process with her.
For me I tend to find myself talking about off the wall things that people seem to like listening to. That or I will talk about whatever things they are interested in if I know anything about it. I try never to repeat myself and keep positive.
The 7:45 one is mine sorry.
Daniel P.
Ryan Sack
Me and my buddy Chad who is also in the class, live in the same apartment complex. My neighbor downstairs, we will call her "Flo", anyway she is kind of a strange woman, known as the "White Witch." Every time we go to the car we need to either run, or sneak to it, not creating any noise, because when she hears us, she will come out and talk to you for an hour about nohing but how her friend wants her to bake something for her. She wont care if it's 6:00 in the morning and your 15 minutes late to work. It's more important that ou know that she's undertaking the important task of making a bunt cake for her friend this wenesday. She's not always boring though, sometimes we get a kick out of her when she tells us how she was poisioned by the water in Stockton and how the government is out to get her. She once told me that all records say that she is actually dead, she then asked my wife if she had any needles in her ears. Apparently, she left her accupuncture appointment feeling like they didn't take all the needles out. Don't you hate that feeling! Immediately after she asked if she could hold my five month old son.
Ryan Sack
Sory I wasn't done yet...
Anyway, I try to be exciting when I talk to people in one on one conversation. I go for the Shock and Awe! approach. It's O.K. to expand the truth, sometimes the truth is not exciting enough.
When I stay home, my mother always talk with me the same thing (you have time to clean up the house). I feel boring what she said because she doesn't know what things I need to do, what I'm thinking. She doesn't understand about me.
I avoid being dull and boring when I speak by understanding the audience and chose interesting ideas. I try to talk clearly and have many evidences to persuade my audience about my ideas. Then, I try to express my thoughts in interesting and funny ways.When I talk, I can understand my audience like or dislike to listen what I'm talking about my ideas.I need to stop and change another idea if my audience is boring.
Thuy Trinh
lol. i too have a boring uncle joe. although his name isnt really joe, but i can relate. evertime i see this guy at family gatherings, he always goes on and on about how he did this and that to help fought in the vietnam war, and how this and that family wants him to marry their daughters (he's that popular, lol). same o stories literally!
what i'd do to not be like him? ummm, well one things forsure, tell different stories. bleh!
HER
Geez…I’m starting to think that that boring person may be me…to some extent anyhow. I take a long time to get to the point because I keep interrupting myself with side commentaries and justifications. What I also recognize, is that as I start to read the signs and symptoms of someone’s lack of attention, I leave out facts or tidbits. Unfortunately for me, it’s these facts and tidbits that oftentimes prevent a conversation/speech from becoming deadly dull.
This self-disclosure has been helpful in two ways. First, I understand that moving out of denial is the first step to recovery. Mission accomplished. And second, since I do recognize the problem, I should be able to do something about it. I’m not completely hopeless since I do recognize the verbal/non-verbal cues. When that glazed look comes into someone’s eyes, or when their “uh-huh” doesn’t quite fall into the right places, I should adjust the information being given accordingly. Also, by trimming the excess packaging I would be less likely to bore every one to tears. My last thought is that at the very least, the topic of discussion should be meaningful and interesting to me, if there is to be any hope for me to be able to convey my love of a topic to the audience. If I’m enthused, there is a greater likelihood that they too will feel enthused. Seems like I might be working on step 2 of Boring-People Anonymous for a while.
K. Vang
A conversation with my uncle is brutal. He can put one to sleep even after indulging in a triple vanilla latte. He has great insight, but I can never tell if he actually believes what he says, who complains about the country he lives in, but resides her comfertably. He always fantasizes and remarks about taking a trip South Africa. He forces me to listen to the radio, via the internet, and enjoy the painful music some small radio program from Johansberg offers. Sometimes people are so dull that it is funny. But this case, is over-the-top boring. As for me, I tend to rabbit trail when speaking so I really focus and word selection an keeping the right train of thought to keep my listeners focused. I believe using BIG words can throw people off, because I totally try to sound smart some times. I believe it is important to use good judgement on the words that are chosen to keep a conversation alive. Have fun with words!
Chad Lobato
To my dear old psychology professor
____(insert name)___,
Why are thy lectures so boring?
Let me count thee ways...
-Is it not counterproductive to make an outline, only to follow it in a monotone voice?
OHh yes you do this, why shall we attend lectures when we can read it on our own.
-Thou does not speak lively or explain new material that we do not know, instead thou just drones on and on without any jokes.
-I find myself laughing out loud
at things to which i can not relate
only to humor you and see a smile appear on your face
-Please bring your students shots of expresso that we can down right before class as a kind of ritual
to make us stay awake as time pass.
-OHhh professor i know that i am not the best at speaking in front of a crowd. but at least i know how to connect. Connect with your audience,and realize that if half of us are asleep its useless to speak to a crowd who rather be counting sheep. Look at our faces and if we are glossy-eyed do something out of your usual routine and give us a good show.i know its early in the morn....but if you think talking is so boring, try listening to yourself and out you will zone
REyna
The obvious or stand out to me is the instructor that i took for my major classes. I have to take him because he is only teaching for that class and these class in order to meet my requirement. I would show up to class and don't paid at all. He speaks very low tone and have no entheastic attitude. Sometimes i don't show up for class. The instrucor knows his subject but his menthod of teaching just bored me.
Luan (Loon)
sandra, i agree....everyone ROCKED last thursday. just wanted to give props to everyone that presented their arguments and got the job done.
(knocks on desk).....bravo.
Right away there is a face that comes to mind. One of my older sisters is the champ when it comes to one sided conversations. There is no getting a word in edge wise with her. And knowing that she will not listen with an open mind makes the conversations incredibly dull. I am always aware that i might as well be talking to a statue. On the phone, in person.. there is no escaping (at least) an hour long "lecture" whenever one comes in contact with her. The worst part is she never likes my boyfriends, so oftentimes the conversation revolves around touchy issues such as that, or her obvious solution to my "problem" which is that i should marry a fire fighter (nevermind the small detail that i happen to like my boyfriend).
On past occasions, such as a day when I have too much to do to devote a couple of hours to a phone call I have tried to say i have to go. This does not work. Nothing works! It is impossible to make the conversation stop. I once missed a date because my several attempts to leave her house were thwarted. And she knew I had a date too.. yet she can always hook you back in by rolling her eyes at your protests and saying things like, " I'm your sister."
To be honest, I don't talk to that many people, because people tend to discuss the same sort of things. I am usually pretty quiet until I get to know someone. So I'd say my best defense against being a bore would be choosing my friends carefully so i know we will have common interests to discuss. other than that.. if someone is yawning or looking around I know they are bored.
-Maureen Crowley
hmm, when i was reading the prompt, the first person which came into my mind was....me! yea, that's right! i talk alot and i have a tendancy to repeat myself so those who really know me just kinda brush it off because they know i can't stop. i don't get to talk to my friends alot simply because i'm too busy but when i do get the chance, they will never hear me stop!
sheng her
I think each of us should define what words "dull" and "boring" mean. Because waht boring for one can be very interesting for another. If I choose to listen to somebody's story I don't think that he/she bores me. I always listen to the end to understand the purpose of whole conversation. But most of the times I cut conversation at the begining because my time is so limited to listen to somebody's story that may be boring. I think the most boring would be useless classes that students have to take in order to graduate from college...
what do I do to avoid being boring? Of course everyone was boring once or many times. I was too! To avoid being boring I try not to talk about one thing for two hours (lol).
Nina Zhigadlo
anonymous said: I have a friend from a previous job that always calls me to complain about her new
job problems. This friend always goes on and on about her problems!
She tells me everynight that they are going to fire her from her job.
I mentioned she should trust in the
lord jesus, and rest her anxiety with him. 1:16AM-06-26-07 Lori M.
Ok let me just start off by saying that I love my grandma to death, but that women will make a bear stay in hibernation threw spring and summer. She can talk for days and not even realize that she is repeating her self over and over in 20 different ways. The worst part about it is that she wont stop untill she feels that she got her point across and then an hour later go back to talking about it again.
I usually try to be as humurous as possible but at the same time im serious, but i really don't talk to any one but my same friends and family so there is no dull moments but if im with someone else ii just try to be myself and most of the time that works.
Brittney Johnson
Well, although I've known quite a few "lazy" talkers, I can't think of anyone in particuler that was worse than all the others; needless to say I didn't hang around them for very long because they drove me CRAZY! But I'm not immuned to being able to ramble on when talking- however I only do it if you get me talking about something I love or feel passionate about. Really though I don't have any special methods or advice other than to say if you're going to talk about something lengthy, condense as much as you need to. =)
Sincerely,
*Jasmine*
one of my friend's girl friend fits right in the category.
she is young, and a good college student, but a conversation with her is just unbearable. not only that she talks nothing thats interesting, she complains all the time, about everything, her family, her friend, school... i feel like she is dumping garbage in my ears!
for me, i don't talk much, and when i do talk, i try to get to the point using the least words. and i don't like to complain to others, its better to bring joy to others...
the last comment was from Kenny
The worst experience of hearing a boring speech was actually from my elder brother who kept explaining stock markets issues to me with a low and stable tone and never asked whether I understood or not. Especially, I am absolutely not interested in any stock trading. Somehow my brother developed a lot of his own opinion about how to forecast the future market. I felt like I was having a lecture but was neglected by him as he assumed I was getting everything he said. Moreover, he also mentioned some international business news to illustrate his ideas which I had no idea about what the news were about.
I think the best way to avoid dull and boring speech/talk is try not to mention topics that listeners are not familiar with. If that needs to be, we can try using simplier and funny examples to explain deeper and trap the attention of the audience. Raising our tone is another good way to keep the audience forcus on our speech.
1:42pm post is by Vicky Hui
One of my friend who talked to me in monotone during every conversation. I felt extremelly bored to the idea that I don't understand. The worst part is that he talked like a lecture from college professor. He never stopped in his conversation or until he finished lecturing. I can't even feel his breathing during his speech.
To avoid dull, I think the speech has to be popular or topic that interested to others. I also think that a speech should based on one's experience and feeling instead of according to lecture or showing how much you know. Therefore, people will likely to listen to you, but as you feel the person seems bored with your speech, you should stop.
Wayne Tsang
We all say that friends are fun to be with, but in some ways i do disagree with that. I have a very close friend whom i always kick it with and who i consider a very boring and annoying person. She talks with a monotone voice (which makes me feel sleepy sometimes) and her voice's very soft like she was whispering. She always talks about her problems with her self-centered boyfriend with me which i found very annoying because she keeps on saying that she'll break up with him (which i think's never gonna happen). She always calls me when she and her bf had a fight and where she's always crying. I get really annoyed because i always hears her monotonic soft crying voice.
I use a lot of EMOTIONS and GESTURES when i speak to avoid a very dull and boring conversation. I make a lot of side jokes to make the people whom im talkin to get interested on what i am talkin bout. I ALSO love to use different variations of voice to make my story interesting. (And sometimes I stare at people to make them listen to me HAHA.)
-Robert Hernandez
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